Love Letter

Hey you,

I don’t really do this a lot. Actually I don’t do this at all. For many reasons to be honest. The first is that, I’ve always been awkward and weird about feelings. Most of the time I don’t know how to process them or I don’t, and they disappear. Some people say it isn’t healthy, but hey, I’m here, I’m alive, I’m happy. Also, I’ve only ever loved God, my family and my friends. None of those relationships have ever required a love letter. So I don’t really know how this usually goes. I have no experience. So I’m venturing into the unknown, baring my soul for everyone to see. God help me.

I didn’t always love you. You know that saying, “Absence makes the heart grow fonder”? I wonder if that’s what it was. I usually don’t like cliches, and snicker at these statements that seem to think they can sum up human nature. But I wonder if it was the absence, or my mind and heart just awakening at the right time. Whatever it is, I’m glad it happened. Because I can’t imagine not feeling this way about you. It drives me. It pushes me. I want to be better, for you. My dreams, my goals, all revolve around you. Thank you for opening yourself to me. I still have so much to learn. Your past intrigues me, your present is complex and I can’t wait for what’s in store for us in the future. Your intricacies and curves are so fascinating that each day with you will be an adventure.

But it’s been tough for you, for us, recently. You’re going through a couple of things, and things might get worse before they get better. I know that, I understand. I’m here for you, and I always will be. We will get through this. I know we will. Because I know the potential you have. The others, they don’t see it. But I do. I can’t wait till everyone sees you the way I do. However, I need you to get better. I’m an addict, and right now you’re heroin. Today is supposed to be a day of celebration. I wish we were in the mood. Sigh.

Happy Independence Day Nigeria.
I love you,
Soala.

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